Conversation with a 3 year old on the drive to preschool:
“Dad, why is dat pweece man parked dare?”
“He’s waiting there to see if people are driving too fast, and then he will tell them to slow down.”
“And he will take dem to jail?”
“No, he’ll give them a ticket for speeding because driving too fast is breaking the law.”
“Were you breaking da law when the pweece man gabe you a ticket too?”
“Yes. I was breaking the law.”
“But if you bwake da law, you will go to jail?”
“Sometimes, yes. But when you get a ticket, you don’t have to go to jail. You just have to pay the money.”
“If you will pay the money, den you will go to jail?”
“No, if you don’t pay the money you will go jail.”
“Did you pay your money?”
“Yes.”
“Cuz if you go to jail den we won’t have a daddy anymore. And den I would be sad.”
“I’m not going to jail son. But you will always have a daddy because no matter where I am, I’ll always be your daddy.”
“Even if you die?”
“Yes, I will always be your daddy, but if I die I won’t be here to see you.”
“Cuz you will be in heaven?”
“Yes.”
“With Jesus?”
“Yes.”
“Can I have ice cream after school?”
“I don’t think so. We’ll see.”
“But it’s a good plan!!”
“Hahaha!”