A Note From Dad

You Might Be a Parent…

For all the parents out there trying to balance life with kids, you need to laugh more often. From the moment the first child rolls out of bed, until the last one finally falls asleep, your day is consumed with the craziness of schedules, chores, errands and so much more, that if feels like you’re running around like a chicken with its head cut off. This page is for you…because “If You’ve Ever Said [insert craziness], You Might Be a Parent”. Welcome to the club. Come on in…watch your step as you navigate the Hot Wheels and Lego’s…dust the Cheerios off the couch and pull up a seat. Make yourself at home and enjoy a laugh on our family and the things we’ve said…and then share with us what it is you once said to your child that you never dreamed would cross your lips. Sharing in each others craziness is good therapy, so please comment below with your own “If You’ve Ever Said […] You Might Be a Parent” moment, and if it’s not self explanatory, the story behind it.

“The water goes in the bathtub, not on the floor!”

“I brought you into this world. I can take you out.”

“Just because it floats, doesn’t mean you have to float it in the toilet.”

“Swallow that before you run out of here.”

“Push it out! Push it out! Push the poop waaaaaay out!”

“Take that out of your nose!”

“Get your hands out of your pants.”

“Not so hard! And not at his head!”

“Do NOT sit on your sister’s head!”

“Stop running with food in your mouth!”

“You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose…just do it in private.”

“No, you cannot put that in your butt!”

“No, you cannot put that in your brother’s butt!”

“Swallow that before you choke on it.”

“Here, stand up and pee in the cup.” (NE was potty training…no diaper on…in the van in a parking lot a LONG way from a bathroom)

“No, you cannot pee in the cup.” (NE later that day standing outside a bathroom)

“Put that back in your boot and eat your dinner.” (SI had taken the liner out of his boot and was playing with it at the dinner table.)

“Get your dirty socks off the table and eat your dinner.”

“Get out of here and let me poop in peace!”

“Don’t put that on your brother’s butt!”

“We don’t drag each other across the floor by the head!”

“Swim goggles go on your face…not your butt.”

“No swinging with a Popsicle in your mouth.”

“Get your mouth off of that!”

“Stop smacking your brother’s butt.”

“Stop grinding Play Doh into the carpet!”

“Keep your hands to yourself. And your feet too, keep your feet to yourself too. Yes, your head too. For that matter, keep all your body parts to yourself!”

“Put the Pooh back on your bed.” (Get your mind out of the trash…we’re talking Winnie the Pooh here)

“You can play with it…you just can’t whack anyone with it.” (Our dear friend D.W. while at our house to her son about a pool noodle.)